The Freedom To Eat Bacon

By notoriouslysinglegirl, April 10, 2026

I unfortunately still crave chicken Mac nuggets and bacon which is the meat candy of the world -Katy Perry

Yesterday I had lunch with a Jewish woman. A boomer entrepreneur. I didn’t know she was Jewish until the end of our lunch.

I ordered a BLT sandwich. Originally she was ordering a burger cooked medium rare but quickly changed her order. “I’ll have what she’s having” she squawked .

Unfortunately, I have no pictures of the BLT, but it was beautiful and definitely delicious. She savored her BLT, and yes the bacon used was top shelf.

Salty. Savory. Crunchy

The entrepreneur was a boomer. A true narcissist at heart. And what’s typical of these narcissistic boomer females is that they are incredibly insecure. They talk about themselves as if they are some type of royal and you are a meager peasant .

Sure, I paid for her BLT

I also paid for her Diet Coke. I only did it because she was crotchety. Complaining from the minute we started speaking on the phone.

“I’m starving let’s have lunch!” she said when I was texting her trying to meet with to see if she’d be interested in purchasing an ad in my magazine.

And suddenly there I was paying for her lunch because she was complaining and crotchety. She didn’t how to use her GPS in her Genesis SUV. She suddenly got anxious not knowing where to go. but somehow she runs a multimillion dollar business.

“Nobody ever buys me lunch”

Well, I did. Just to shut her up. And perhaps it was kinda like the “Jessica” trend on TikTok where a toddler is having a tantrum and spiraling. Once someone says “Jessica” the toddler’s tantrum stops and they start looking for “Jessica”. It worked because she stopped complaining. It got her outta her fight or flight response. It got her outta her EGO and into the present moment.

Although after spending an hour talking about herself, she continued to interrupt me when I was telling her about me. She said I was doing too much. She love bombed me and told me how beautiful I was. Then proceeded to insert her project into mine and told me she’d pay me a certain fee to get her some clients.

She proceeded to put down my ideas. My skill set. She gave me unsolicited advice on how to use chat GPT to come up with a business plan.

Yeah. I think even a 5 year old could do that by now.

After the lunch, she asked for a to go box. She then passed her sandwich to me. “Here take this home. My husband won’t allow me to eat bacon so I can’t take this home. We’re Jewish and he gets mad if I eat bacon so I sneak around behind his back.”

It’s kinda like this woman was having an affair with bacon while her husband plays padel at a near by hotel. Her character is straight out of a dystopian sit com. Crotchety entrepreneur puts down other females so that they could work on her MLM business.

After lunch, we walked to a local bookstore “that woman at counter doesn’t like me. She doesn’t smile anytime I come in here.”

I was fascinated watching this character develop in my personal screenplay. Now she was getting schizo thinking everyone has to conform to her royal standards.

I tried to bid her farewell in the book store. That’s where I wanted this scene to end, but the character didn’t want it to end here. This is typical in writing. Sometimes your character starts to control the scene and will kinda sabotage you. And indeed she needed to show me something.

As we walked down the street we came to her car, a silver Genesis SUV. “Oh, the car goes back to Connecticut on Sunday” she mused.

“Are you driving all the way to Connecticut?”

“No, we’re shipping the car”

She gave me a hug. Got into her Genesis and drove off to reunite with her husband.

At this moment, I realized I had been an accomplice to her affair with bacon. Hell, I even paid for it.