The Problem With Dating: It’s One Dimensional

By notoriouslysinglegirl, August 1, 2024

Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.

-Rhett Butler, Gone With The Wind

I was reading an article yesterday in the New York Times where a woman was complaining that’s she’s been on Tinder for the last 10 years and she’s still single. She’s ready to shell out $4500.00 for a match maker. I’m not sure hiring a matchmaker on a service like Tawkify is any better.

The Dating Damsel on TikTok has been sharing her personal $4500.00 dating on Tawkify journey. Her stories don’t sound any different than the typical app dating stories. The Dating Damsel has been on 5 dates with 5 different men and the guys all sound the same dry, dull and boring.

The second guy, who she went on a second date with, did sound fun. Yes, it’s true. She did see a “red purse” ( she uses a red Louis Vuitton purse instead of a red flag). Date #2 took The Dating Damsel out on an airplane ride for their second date. He’s a pilot. He’s got kids. He said he was “divorced.”

After the high flying adventure, Date #2 sent a message to The Dating Damsel that she “triggered” him. And of course there was no date #3. The Dating Damsel then had a meeting with her Tawkify match maker. She asked the match maker if date #2 was indeed divorced? The matchmaker replied “Yes, he’s divorced on paper. However, it’s possible that he’s not divorced “emotionally.”

Dating, It’s One Dimensional

There’s a movie called Flatland that explains “one dimensional” people perfectly. Many men that I have personally dated off of dating apps are incredibly “one dimensional”: having a single focus, narrow and superficial.

My last physical date was in October 2023. I met a guy off of Bumble. He was in his late 50’s early 60’s. I don’t know his correct age because I think he “lied” on his profile. He also said he was an architect.

We met at my favorite bar in Palm Springs, Paul Bar. It’s a locals bar and the guy was “semi local” since he said he owned a house in PS, but didn’t live here full time.

When I met him at the bar he seemed shy and stand offish. Paul Bar is a super fun place. On one side of our table, we sat next to a heterosexual couple from Canada who shared their bottle of wine with us. On the other side, there was a party of gay men who we started to discuss “architecture” with. Although, the guy studied architecture in school, he actually worked in commercial real estate. Things seemed a bit odd in his story. He had a 16 year old daughter but never saw her. He was married for 25 years, and said he was divorced for 5 years. Yet, he spoke about his ex wife as if they had just divorced yesterday. He also kept asking me why I didn’t work in a hospital since I was a “nurse?” I corrected him, “I’m a Nurse Practitioner, and most of us work in clinics.” I’m also a writer.

I made the mistake of talking about my “creative “ side with this guy which I think “triggered” him. He then seemed to get anxious and said “why can’t you just work in a hospital. And when are you going to slow down?”

I thought this was odd. I mean, I just met the guy and now he was trying to “control” my life. This guy was definitely stuck in “one dimensional “ type of thinking, and in my opinion, still emotionally attached to his ex wife. And in The Dating Damsels perspective, he had a lot of “red purses” popping up.

I’ve been off dating apps since May 2024. It feels amazing. And if a guy is gonna enter my life, he needs to be a multidimensional being like I am.

Happy Dating! ❤️👠💋